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1. |
One Last Moment Sometime
02:41
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I wait for you here you come to me again
I’m in my bed breathing heavy exhaling with the cold wind rattling my windows
O death where have you been all my life?
You give me certainty, some ominous comfort
Leave me with terror I will try to turn into something
Oh you shake me and you make me stare you straight in the face
Before you let me wake can I stay awhile before you take me?
My most faithful lover comes to me every night wraps my heart in cold, cold ice
Leads my soul to doubt everything in this life except for you
I wake up and I’m paralyzed and I know that I won’t be alive
After one last moment sometime
It’s not about the void or calling the void god
It’s the fear of nothing ever mattered
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2. |
White Lies
04:59
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I'm the punchline to a mean joke
in this country almost everyone laughs
my childhood was a nightmare
they either taunted or were silent, aghast
my mother was born on the reserve
a few hours drive from here
but she don't talk about that
it's not the kind of place you make a career
but then neither is this one
dirty natives need not apply
we don't tip, and we're all drunks
what relief when we finally die off
white lies must be nice
to not be openly despised
I wish I could tell you what I feel from your eyes
lead the savages to the church house
beat Jesus into their hides
for the stubborn, whiskey and smallpox
it's amazing any survived
here we are like some lepers
for whom most can't empathize
a broken people a reminder
of imperialism's design
chorus
In a store I'm a thief on a screen a red chief
in the graveyard a suicide
at school I'm a chug
in the street I'm a thug
in the bank I'm a welfare free ride
I feel like I'm disappearing
I'm scared I've always been gone
I feel like the part they throw away
from an animal slaughtered in it's cage
My grandma was made catholic
she was so young when the nuns cut off her beautiful hair
they beat her cause she was left-handed
I agree the devil was there
in the residential schools of lower canada
o' canada
I am a lame deer
amongst the civilized
I am my ancestors
fading battle cries
O' Great Spirit
when life fades
may I come to you
without shame
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3. |
Pretenders
03:30
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if my songs make you sad
it's cause we both know that
there's nothing like the first time
I've learned it the hardest way
the wanting leads us further astray
but to go without is terrible
years on end without shame
I wanted glory not the fame
oh, the lies we tell ourselves
how can I fear death but not the blackout
in oblivion I can't stand out
and everyone secretly believes they're different
what I have to give up to survive
makes me feel less alive
youth has been my currency
I'm running out, will you run out on me?
you envy your kids when they do things you can't do anymore
it breaks your heart when they give up what you never could
if my songs make you blue
it's because you feel it too
we've stopped pretending
if we don't make it
I don't think I'll make it
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4. |
Back in Nashville
03:45
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you told me once you were born for me
I left something back in Nashville, Tennessee
maybe a guitar or some haunting melody
more like a feeling like I want to be free
well our story so far isn't nothing new
you're my best friend and my lover too
all that passion, baby all that pain
is it sorrow or wisdom that we gain
I know you've shown me the way that you wanna go
I'm not so sure, i just wanna let you know
I'll always love you that's no lie
'cause I mean what I say and I'm saying it now
goodbye
we were fighting all my words sounded so wrong
in the stale air so i put them in a song
and i tried to tell you oh so many things
like did you ever listen, i mean were you really listening?
in the old days you held me so right
now when you hold me it's a little too tight
in the old days you held me so right
now when you hold me baby, you're holding on for dear life
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5. |
Before Edison
03:50
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The rain that I'm wandering through in the same streets as my favorite Jew. Westmount after the war. L'hiver avec Leonard, je prendre encore. We leave our hearts like an open wound. We live our hearts like an open wound. These hearts will heal soon. If we protect them. You do things to me I can't do to myself or to you. Confused we stare into the sound the cops are smiling something profound. The light was warmer then your body candelit the light was different then before Edison. Should I stop myself in dreams from doing unspeakable things. A code you break but never keep ultimatums faith can't afford to leap. These hearts will heal soon if we forget them.
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6. |
Prairie Night
04:16
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Don't it feel good to not be wasting time. Stay up all night writing songs it's too cold to go outside. George Harrison called them the naughty chords, y'know the 6ths, 11ths and 9ths. It gets dark for a moment then we come out the other side. I was so lucky I could say the words, "I almost died." On a mountain pass she tried to run us off. Fireball, emptiness inside. Of course I noted the irony, all those nights I'd drink and drive. Oh, and it wasn't right, it's never right. But now I'm here to give everything I have to this prairie night. I try to get myself all tingly warm without my trusty wine. It's not as easy as getting bored but I'm stubborn so I try to break the waves crashing over me carry them away without spilling a single drop. In the dead of winter under a film of ice the St. Lawrence gurgles and churns until it empties out where the salt returns. Back west it's two hours earlier and you guys surrender to this prairie night.
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7. |
At the End of Your Day
03:31
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I’ll be up all night watching old movies and reading books
But I’ll crawl into bed before the sun and you get up for work
You’ll kiss me goodbye then I’ll get up and feed the dog
Make breakfast for the brat, take her to the school bus
And wave as the driver pulls away
I’ll see you again at the end of your day
I wonder what it’s like inside your head
Hope you’re having fun, don’t worry
Let others do that instead
When it’s freezing it’s the best
Take off your clothes, climb back in bed
Drift off in the warmth
Camaraderie of honking horns
People getting there safely together
The worriers will worry
The miserable will mise
The selfish will sell
Shame to the dignified
Overachievers will stop trying
Drunks put the bottle down
The mime just started talking
There was no one else around
The strangers started waving
To each other in the street
If you’re living in this city
Maybe one day we’ll meet
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8. |
The Last Things
03:40
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Take it slow with me these are words so hard to hear
I don’t know, I don’t know (unconscious terror)
I’m beside I’m beside (the deceitful bearer)
Of our time in the days barely lasting
Don’t give up your goodness child
Survival’s not the same as being alive
Those who escaped climbed the walls
Clawed through black mud
And the rain and the rain (made them colder)
When it came when it came (the sun was grey)
And the road could not take them home
Don’t give up your children mothers
Your purpose here is to make them free
Let the black sheep take charge up the stormy mountain
In your backyard where I buried all your letters
I will wait for you again if we get to start again I will sing your song all this weary life long
Don’t let go of this melancholy
It’s life’s lasting feeling time cannot erase
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9. |
Dusklovers
01:24
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Dusklover, how long has it been since the sunrise meant a beginning
Dusklover, this is a dangerous time,
the cars can’t decide whether to turn on their lights
dusklover, twilight is like that feeling right before a storm
you feel electric, can’t quantify what lies between us and those stars
dusklover, I admire your penchant for the dramatic
dusklover, you ignore so well that failure is automatic
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10. |
Anna Karina
02:11
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Anna Karina I ain’t never seen ya
Except across some movie screen
A woman is a woman and you’re the most beautiful
Woman I’ve ever seen
Anna Karina I’ve only dreamed that
I’d meet somebody like you
With your eyes painted dark and a cigarette
To spark a heart from feeling so blue
Winona Ryder when I lay down beside her
She just don’t compare my love
She’s been with my friends, won’t stay ‘till the end
But you’re the one I’m thinking of
Anna Karina I ain’t never seen a
Girl as pretty as you
If I could go back in time then I’d make you mine
And Jean Luc is the one feeling blue
Anna Karina you’ve made me a fiend
An addict for new wave French film
But I live in Alberta where they’ve never heard of
A cow as a pet they just kill ‘em
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11. |
Forget Goodbye
03:38
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Pools of mud from rain
Then the grey and barren sky
All you had to say
Stay the winter and forget goodbye
Eyes well up with tears
The water well is plenty dry
Can we last the year
Each one has passed us, barely getting by
We pray for dignity
What does it really mean?
Stark raving can’t shake
This cold from our yellow bones
A thirst dangerous to slake
You can ill afford to leave them alone
Curse this western land
Vast and awesome emptiness
There’s no gold just sand
The Indians hadn’t mentioned this
We pray for dignity
What can it really mean?
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12. |
Heavy Branches
03:38
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give me your winter kiss
what if we weren't born here?
what if we weren't born
the snow turns into slush then the rain covers the city in ice
hold my arm if we fall, we fall together
we always take this street, let's try the next one
I need a next one
careful, the snow plows will run you over
driving on the sidewalk
the time has passed when I can trust myself fucked up
I fucked up so many times even sorry is an insult
so many times now sorry is an insult
I find myself older than the college girls in coffee shops
It's curious. How we see ourselves.
Some omniscient static being buried inside this aging skin
Half a closet full of clothes terrified she can't fit in
I long for your icy lips
you never let your guard down
I see the good in that now
we all need some protection
even from each other - usually from each other
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13. |
Past Nostalgia
02:16
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There’s an old photo of a younger you
There’s a consciousness we’re not privy too
There’s an orchestra playing inside my brain
But I can’t transcribe it and the spirit wanes
Past nostalgia to something more sincere
It hurts a whole lot worse but it’s still not clear
I’ll keep looking here
Got a call from an old friend, saying nothing’s right
Been drunk all December still the wife won’t fight
There’s nothing worse than prolonged lethargy
From the one you used to love so disarmingly
Past despair to something more catatonic
What’s in your mind, am I still on it
Some fading sonnet
Hey, you can call me anytime
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14. |
The Shiver
03:17
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Your eyes shone. You took off your clothes. I was 17. You're nervous. Ah, but you're so pretty I wouldn't change a thing on you. Every night bursts at the seams couldn't figure out what she means trying anything, I'll try anything does it feel alright? The band's in the basement someone called the cops, they're gonna have to arrest us before we stop. That night we got beat up real bad it was you and me. It was you and me. Someone carry me awhile I feel like I'm running out of days.
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15. |
Movie Song #3
03:07
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I’m a man who loves women but let’s make it clear
I’m more Cassavetes than O ‘Toole, hell we made it here
There’re movies about movies, books about books
This is a song for all the songs your beauty took
Like John and Gena, Henry and June
No matter how long it’s over too soon
It was nothing but Herzog and Godard that one fall
We’d fuck between films, Jesus freaks down the hall
‘The Bicycle Thief’ anything by Bresson
A newborn not even 20, baby you were so strong
You say you’re not afraid to die
I just can’t say goodbye
I watched ‘Paris, Texas’ with a broken heart
Nattasya Kinski was playing your part
I realized all that mattered was you
I’ll wander through the desert if it’s what I have to do
I’ll crawl through the desert if it’s what I have to do
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The City Streets Edmonton, Alberta
Rick Reid, Matt Leddy, Mark Chmilar. 2005-2013. Edmonton/Montreal.
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